Art Therapy Monster

Lately I've been enjoying learning a little about art therapy and practicing some interventions on myself. Toward those ends, I read all the blogs by art therapists I can find (and I wish more of them blogged as I haven't found all that many). However, the few I do read are pretty awesome and today one of them, Carolyn Mehlomakulu, did a post on metaphorizing problems into monsters via art media of some kind. Rather than elaborate on the dynamics here by quoting too extensively, I'll link to the post in question and encourage people to go have a read. It's interesting stuff.

At any rate, thus was I inspired to create Fran The Tired Monster.

Let me tell you about my monster. I have three children under three. (Well, one of them won't be born for another few months yet, but she still has all kinds of ways of making her presence very much known. So practically speaking, I feel I have three under three already.) I've always wanted at least a few kids and I think there are advantages to having them close in age. Realistically, though, I expect that most of those advantages are things we will be experiencing more in the years to come. Right now, I love my babies bunches but I'm tired a lot.

It so happened that I was particularly tired by the time I got some time to myself today, as I'm fighting off a cold and so is Little Guy, and neither kid was good about taking a nap this afternoon (erm, is this all starting to sound too Dickensian)? I ended up hiring the teeenager across the street for an hour of babysitting so I could rest. Whilst relaxing and skimming the feeds on my google reader, I came across the post mentioned above and thought, "Ah, yes, this is what I will do right now. Make a portrait of my monster of woe."

And so, here is Fran, poor girl:

I didn't actually finish her by the time the kids came home, but that was okay because I set Bear up with some art supplies and we worked together companionably for a bit while Little Guy played on the floor. It was kind of fun-- blending feelings of self pity and humor into an understanding monster that I now have some affection for.

 I think, after the kids are settled for bed, Fran and I will satisfy a pregnancy craving and treat ourselves to a bowl of mint chocolate chip icecream. With vanilla wafers and whipped cream and bananas. Now that is the way to make friends with a monster. :)

Ciao.

Fall Fearless and Fly Challenge 7

I had this unfinished page in my art journal from sometime last week.

When I read about the current Fall Fearless and Fly challenge I had the idea of using the page as a base. Here are the prompts for the challenge: 

Headline Prompt:  Future Imperfect: What is different about your life now than what you once expected it to be?  How is the way it turned out perfect or imperfect.  If your future turns out differently than you imagined in the first prompt, could it still be perfect?
Color Prompt: Yellow
Quote Prompt: "Existence really is an imperfect tense that never becomes a present."  Friedrich Nietzsche

And here is my journal page again, some yellowing up, several layers, some extensive journaling, one imperfect human figure, and one Nietzsche quote later:

 

I dunno. I'm liking the center, the rest not so much. It seems unfinished, but then again that does kind of jive with the spirit of the quote prompt. :) I have a feeling this page will be repurposed and at least partially painted over again someday. Might as well get as much mileage out of my Strathmore Journalas possible. :)

Art Journal Page: Words Behind a Brick Wall

 While I was making today's art journal page, I actually remembered to keep a camera by me so I could snap a few pictures of the page in progress as I went. I enjoy my own blog posts better when I have pics of the stages of a page, so I'm assuming it works that way for readers as well.

Here goes. 

I started, as usual, with some diary writing on a blank page. This began sedately enough but quickly devolved into the pen and paper equivalent of incoherent scribbly screeching. The page actually looks pretty psychotic at this point, but it's all good.

 I colored over it with a couple of my daughter's Crayolas.

Then I drew a rough brick background with a sharpie, painted over it with some very thinned down acrylic cream colored paint,  and added a layer of journaling in pencil.

And here are a couple of the finished page, embellished with more paint, some words, and paper motifs.

 It says, "Words behind a brick wall add character and mystique." I was kind of thinking about that as I worked the page, obscuring my journaling, "walling" it in, in effect. I thought about how much is made in these days of the virtues of authenticity, being real, letting down walls, emotional intimacy, and etc. These are each cliches in their own right. And in all seriousness, I do believe we are the better off for being capable of emotional intimacy. Still. . .  I retain an appreciative regard for secrets, the enigmatic, the elusive quality of silences colored with unspoken words, the mystery of the half told tale.

In Shadowlands, one of my favorite movies, Anthony Hopkins' character says (and I'm quoting sketchily from memory here):

"Why do you look at me like that?"
"Like what?" (Debra Winger's character)
"As though I were lying to you. I mean what I say."
"I know you mean what you say Jack, but you never say it all, now do you?"
"Well, one can't say it all. It would take too much time."

I just love that scene, probably partly because it's so well acted.  But it's true. One can't say it all. Sometimes because it would take too much time, most often because of all we lose in translation.

End of introspective musings for the day.

Hope everyone's year is off to a good start! :)

Linking to Paint Party Friday and Art Journal Every Day.

Blue Christmas Art Journal Page

Merry Christmas.

I created this page in my art journal last night, but little did I know then how fitting my color choice would be. This is a blue Christmas. Within the last 48 hours about a third of my relatives have fallen ill with the flu, some from every household. Up until the last, the healthiest ones were still intending on a small get together, but as of this morning even more people are sick and so Christmas has been cancelled. :(

H, the kids, and I are all well and would just as soon keep it that way, so. . . guess we'll be spending a quiet day at home. Might go out to eat somewhere for lunch; haven't decided yet.

Maybe we'll see the family at New Years. I sure hope everyone gets well soon.

Goth Girl Mixed Media Collage Art Journal Page

No wordy post for today. I guess this art journal page and the little goth girl that materialized for it speak for themselves. It was fun to work on. It's one of my favorite art journal pages that I've done so far--  I have some affection for the inner goth kid, it seems. Mixed media used include: watersoluble pastels, acrylic paint, a white paint pen, black sharpie, glue, and fabric.

Entering Forever Night's challenge (just for fun, I realize this page is not all that dark).

The Fire Behind The Questions

When I first saw the prompts for the Fall Fearless and Fly challenge 6, I knew that creating something for it would be an interesting experience for me at any rate, provided I could manage to do so. At first I was thinking I might pass on this one. . . too complicated, but yesterday I felt I was getting a glimmering of an idea, or a least of a starting point, for it so I sat down with my open art journal to see what would materialize. After all, I've inadvertently picked up the habit of religious art journaling by participating in Rebecca's  meme, so may as well go with the flow.

Here, btw, are the Fall Fearless and Fly prompts for challenge 6:


Headline Prompt:  Divided by God:  What does "God" mean to you?  How do you access"God" or the divine or the sacred in your life?
Color Prompt: Metallics - gold, silver, copper, bronze, or all of them!
Quote Prompt: "This is my simple religion.  There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy.  Our own brain, our own heart, is our temple; the philosophy is kindness."  The Dalai Lama

"What does 'God' mean to me?" Rather a big question, that. But I've always been particularly captivated by the fire images in the Bible-- the pillar of fire that led the wandering Israelites by night, the burning bush in the desert, the tongues of fire that appeared above the believers on the day of Pentecost. So I began preparing a background with fiery colors-- oranges, reds, and yellows. Using a gold paint pen (that's the metallic prompt, there) I drew a dotted line spiraling out from the center and over that outlined some "tongues of fire" over the page. I drew a spiraling line with a silver gel pen as well but it only shows up faintly in the picture.The background still didn't seem full enough somehow, so in between my dotted lines I began writing words from Acts chapter 2 (which contains the story concerning the day of Pentecost and the tongues of fire mentioned above) with a white paint pen. The words spiral outward from the center and here and there I got thrown off course, so it's almost impossible to read, but that's okay.

I was liking the way this looked but felt it needed a focal point and some human interest, so began flipping through old magazines looking for some inspiration. The image I chose is from 2001 Benjamin Moore ad, in case anyone cares. Something about the woman's facial expression and posture resonated with my current mood, so she was pasted in. I think of the resulting page as a kind of abstract religious self portrait. Let me explain, if I can manage it in a paragraph or two. Those who are not interested in personal autobiography may stop reading here.

My parents were enthusiastic converts of the Jesus Movement era in the 1970's-- "born again, Spirit filled, fire baptized believers". They spent the next several years, including those of my earliest childhood, as followers of the Pentecostal/charismatic Christianity of their day. I was still very young, but old enough to remember, when they began to be disillusioned by some of the scandal, fraud, showmanship, and extremism that the movement regrettably spawned. They left the church we belonged to and began exploring other avenues of belief and practice, over a somewhat zany and occasionally bizarre couple decades of spiritual searching that would indelibly shape my own life and formative years especially. The good news is I made it out alive and mostly sane. :)

So, partly in an effort to puzzle out the import of our life stories, largely in an attempt to figure out my own beliefs, and partly out of genuine interest in the subjects, I've immersed myself in reading over the past couple years on the history of Christianity (especially in America), theology, and the philosophy of religion. It's really only recently that I feel I've emerged from the rubble of books, with a more or less intact faith and nuanced views that have now predictably become something of a hodge podge. Looking back, I have to say I'm appreciative of H's tolerance and patience during those times I was preoccupied with existential wrestling and probably not the easiest to live with! We were also visiting a variety of churches at the time, both together and separately, uncertain of quite where to place our growing family (it was important to both of us to find a church home somewhere.)

I suppose detailing the process could fill a book (and maybe not a terribly fascinating one) of it's own, but in a somewhat surprising twist of fate, we've ended up back in a church the pastor of which is a member of one of the Pentecostal denominations. It's milder and more reasonable than some of what I've witnessed in the past, but familiar enough that it gives me a not unpleasant feeling of having come full circle, at least for the time being. I think of it affectionately as "charismatic-lite", a little evangelical church in the country not more than twenty minutes from where we live. It's unpretentious, not too thinky, has good music, and the worship, prayer, and preaching style remind me of the positive aspects of my roots and earliest religious memories from childhood. The congregation is laid back, friendly and they were extremely kind and helpful to my family during my recent bout with hyperemesis. It's not where I expected we'd end up, but somehow being there for now feels natural for us, like a simple clicking into place. A relief given my historical tendencies to over complicate things. Most importantly, and perhaps partly because of these other things, I do feel a sense of spiritual connection there-- a reminder that what matters most is not the answers or the questions or even the journey itself, but being in touch with the fire glowing everlastingly behind these things.

Thanks FFF for the amazing inspiration and prompt!

Also linking to Paint Party Friday.

A Virgin A Day-- A Sword Shall Pierce Your Own Heart

 It seems the conditions of life are such that being open to love means being open not only to pain as well, but to the possibility of agony. I look at my babies and think of the littlest one growing in my womb feel such a surge of protective love for them all. And then I think of Mary, holding that baby that she would live to see crucified. There really are no words for these kinds of contemplations, but I have been meditating a little on the depth of the love and pain that must coexist in the heart of the Madonna, and of God himself.

Constructing yesterday's art journal page was a straightforward process. I had an image and quote I wanted to use and prepared a simple background for them. I feel that this Mary's long black robes and austere expression are a suitable match for the biblical quote, which indeed was one of the first things that came to mind when I saw her.

This is my third journal page done in participation with the twelve days of Mary at the Recuerda Mi Corazon blog.

A Virgin a Day-- Magnificat and 12 stars

 

The Holy Virgin is taking over my art journal. In a way, this is so funny. I was not even intending on participating in "A Virgin a Day" more than that one time. I am not even Catholic! lol. But when I sat down at my art journal yesterday, this is what happened.

I think it is because I have been so captivated by all the inspiring tributes I'm finding on blogs participating in A Virgin a Day. As a result, the Magnificat has been kicking around in my head for the last 24 hours, and when presented with a blank white page in my journal, that is what demanded to be written. And that's what art journaling is all about, right? Go with the flow, go with the flow. In a way, it can be like a spiritual practice of it's own. So I scribbled down the ESV rendition of the Magnificat with a red gel pen, which forms the text you see behind the painting, writing the words "blessed" ("all generations will call me blessed") and "forever" ("to Abraham and to his offspring forever") large. Then I did some doodling with a led pencil, just for a change, and painted/colored the rest with neocolor pastels over that. (It's a little bit greener in real life than it is in the picture. My photographer is at his day job this morning so I had to take the picture myself.)

There are twelve penciled stars in the upper left hand corner. I was thinking of the twelve stars from the stunning passage in Revelation:

"And a great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of twelve stars. She was pregnant and was crying out in birth pains and the agony of giving birth. And another sign appeared in heaven: behold, a great red dragon, with seven heads and ten horns, and on his head seven diadems. His tail swept down a third of the stars of heaven and cast them to the earth. And the dragon stood before the woman who was about to give birth, so that when she bore her child he might devour it. She gave birth to a male child, one who is to rule all the nations with a rod of iron, but her child was caught up to God and to his throne, and the woman fled into the wilderness, where she has a place prepared by God, in which she is to be nourished 1,260 days." 

Revelation 12:1-6

Don't Forget To Tie Your Heartstrings

I am sleepy so this is going to be a short blog post! I filled another page in my art journal today. This one was inspired by the Simon Says Stamp and Show Heart Challenge as well as the Frilly and Funkie Chipboard and Metal Challenge.

I pasted torn pieces of bookpaper into my art journal and colored over them with a water soluble pastel, then painted with water, you know the drill. I machine stitched the heart together with more book paper and left the threads long, then I tied these to little heart embellishments I cut out of chipboard and aluminum foil. I journaled over the whole page with a silver gel pen, which only shows up a little, so it was something in the nature of "secret" journaling. It smudged a little, too. Then I wrote with a sharpie: "Remember: Don't forget to tie your heart strings."

For me, this page is about taking the time to nurture emotional connections with others, rather than simply skimming the surface of life by settling for superficial relationships. It's also about tying my heart to things that matter and that have meaning-- whether literature, art, music, a place, cultivating a sense of place. I had in mind the concept of an emotionally anchored heart.

(Edit: Eek, just came and looked at my post and photos again this morning. These pictures are really terrible. In real life, the colors pop much more, you can clearly see all the sewing machine stitching and dangling threads, and there is visible texture and layering in the background. The quality of my photos seems to be very hit or miss; I must figure out how to get a better handle on this soon.)

Bella Toscana, (fifth art journal page)

Recently I have reached the point of realizing that if I knew even some rudimentary fundamentals of watercolor technique and design principles, I could likely create more variety and interest in my art journal pages. I feel like I have ideas that are prevented from being born into being by my lack of skill.

The library in such cases is always my first place to start. So, Saturday afternoon, I hauled my pregnant self to the local library and up it's curving staircase to the second floor stacks where the non-fiction section and art books lay waiting for me.

I selected four books on watercolor, replete with gorgeous illustrations, step by step examples, and helpful beginner-speak (most of them).

• David Bellamy's Complete Guide to Watercolor Painting
• Brush with Watercolor: Painting Watercolor Landscapes the Easy Way (vol. 1 and 2), Terry Harrison

• No Experience Required: Watercolor, Carol Cooper
• I also picked up a novel by Carol Goodman, The Drowning Tree, which looks to be excellent but I suppose that is neither here nor there so far as this post is concerned. 

I spent a few hours poring over the watercolor books after the kids went to sleep Sat. evening and during their naps Sunday afternoon. By Sunday evening, I was itching to actually try painting a landscape myself. I have saved in a little drawer of keepsakes a 2007 National Geographic calendar of gorgeous photographs of Italy. H picked it up as a "just because" present for me, back before we were even dating. I knew he liked me, though. ;-)

Anyway, I flipped through it and quickly located one of my favorites of the pictures: "Country Foad, Tuscany. Bingo. Out came the art journal, Caran d'anche Neocolor ll watersoluble pastels, pencil, a cup of water, and brush set. Yes, I was excited. I marked off a square for my landscape and left a strip of blank space on the page, which I would later brush over with a light wash of ocre and inscribe with the Our Father, written in Italian. I think it is so beautiful that way, a million times lovelier than in English. And in my imagination (never having been there in person) the beauty of the Tuscan countryside is a natural background for the peace, serenity, and timelessness of the prayer.  I liked the idea of placing them together for my art journal page.

Here it is, my first landscape. If you click on the image it gets bigger. I think it looks a bit overworked in some places, a few of the trees lean a little crookedly, and I'm obviously new at this shade and lighting stuff, but it was fun and it actually looks like the original photograph. . . you can tell what it is! :-) Ah, bella Tuscany. Unfortunately I got a few words of the Padre Nostro backwards, but that's all right! Imperfection is okay around here! :)

4th Art Journal Page

Yesterday H took the kids off for the better part of the day, and I spent some time hanging out with my friend Brittany. We went shopping, had lunch at Olive Garden, and then came back to my house to scribble in our art journals. Because whatever else I may have failed to accomplish in this life so far, I have succeeded in inspiring Brittany to begin this art journaling thing.

I suggested she pick a theme that we could both work from, and she decided on "Lord of the Rings." Why was I not surprised? :)

However, I am not myself so much a LOTR girl, so although I knew there were potentially about a million different directions one could take this, I was stumped for a bit as to what I could do. I kept mentally running over scenes from the movie trying to see if one "spoke" to me enough to make me want to use it as a starting point for journaling. My imagination settled on the scene where Gandalf is trapped at the top of a tower, eventually to be rescued by a friendly eagle. It's one of the scenes that stays with you-- the solitary banished wizard alone on the towering height, mercy and rescue in the form of an unexpected winged visitor. I thought I'd do a loose creative interpretation of the tower. I seemed to remember it was very narrow and spindly, with a cup like open air "room" at the top. I ended up getting some Jack and the Beanstalk and Alice in Wonderland spirit blended in there. That's actually more my speed than this Middle Earth stuff, but don't tell Brittany I said so. :)

The picture of my art journal page above is not the exact one I did yesterday, but rather a reworking of the idea on a new page. Yesterday's background was a bit of a disaster-- I had too many colors going on and it was too runny. But I liked the general idea so I tried it again this morning while coloring with my daughter. I stuck with a more focused color scheme, added some text made of pasted in magazine words and letter squares, and drew a border with a black Sharpie and white gel pen.

The text reads, "At times, we all need rescue." Even wizards, right? Celebrating vulnerability, a la Lord of the Rings and Brene Brown. ;-)

Gratitude

I created this page for Simon Says Stamp and Show's "Thank You" challenge.

You know, being new at all of this, I had to think a little bit about this matter of participating in blog challenges before I could decide whether or not I was okay with doing so. Was this in keeping with my purposes for my art journal and blog? Would creating pages here and there around themes for public  challenges somehow take away from the journal-y-ness and spontaneity of my little project? Would I become more stressed and self conscious about creating? I decided that really, there was no reason this should be so. No reason I couldn't just take a theme as a jumping off point for inspiration and just do whatever I felt like with it. Indeed, maybe that is part of the point of these things. There is also something nice about participating in things in general. Human beings like doing that. I figured that by staying realistic about my expectations for myself, I could manage to link up without losing my soul.

That orienting attitude worked out for this, my third art journal page, which turns out to be the most personal and journal-y one I've done so far-- I think partly because I used some of my own words instead of sticking with literary excerpts, and also because this page was very much a spontaneous evolution. I didn't plan out any of the steps ahead of time, I just went with the flow.

I was in a different sort of headspace when I worked on this page than I usually am when I work on art journaling or do anything hands on and creative. For one thing, I was feeling really sick and was very discouraged about that. This was yesterday evening. I had had a fabulous Thanksgiving day and had been feeling very well, but somehow that evening my pregnancy nausea came back and hit me nearly full force. I thought I had eaten carefully and in moderation, but who knows. It almost felt like hyperemesis starting all over again.This discouraged me more than usual, because I have so enjoyed feeling better the last week or so and had ardently hoped the debilitaing ill feelings were entirely a thing of the past. I started to feel depressed about this, and I suppose fatigue, post holiday let down, and good ol' fashioned pregnancy hormones may have been contributing to that feeling.

So, after the kids were settled, I propped myself up in bed on some pillows and parked my box of art supplies next to me, hoping to distract myself from the nausea and pull myself out of my low mood by working on my gratitude page. It took a little while, but proved effective on both counts.

I forgot to take photos of this page in progress, but will describe what I did here. Using gel pens, I loosely traced some quilting templates of flowers, from Elise M. Campbell's book, Winning Stitches. I colored their centers and added some doodled accents with the gel pens as well. Then I came in with my texts. I chose a quote from Alexander Schemman that has been kicking around in the back of my head for the last few months, "Everyone capable of thanksgiving is capable of salvation and eternal joy." I was happy to have such a timely opportunity for using it. I also wrote, "Humility and gratitude form the gateway to spiritual peace and all blessings," which is a Leah original, I believe. I had jotted it down in my journal (my other, non-art, pen and paper journal) awhile back.

Then I thought I'd personalize the page a bit more by moving from the general to the particular, so I wrote: "I am grateful that hyperemesis ended in time for me to enjoy cooking and eating Thanksgiving dinner with family and friends." I also dated the page. A prosaically phrased little sentiment, but really that is the one thing I felt the most grateful for this Thanksgiving. Then I remembered my kids and that I was also thankful for them, so added their nicknames, scribbled in spaces here and there.

I colored over the whole thing with a sky blue pastel, then painted over the page with water. The ink on the flowers I had most recently drawn and on the wording began to smudge, but I decided that was okay-- smudgy was okay for this one. I even liked the way it made the words look. When the page had dried a little, I colored in the flowers and then painted the page with water again,  letting the colors smear and run together. After it dried I did this a second time, coloring some in the spaces between the flowers as well.

By this time a couple hours had passed and I was sleepy, feeling better, and both more content and more relaxed. Yay for art journaling! Therapeutic, yes? I did not think I was done with the page. I wanted to color some more in the flowers with orange or pink, or both, but I was then nearly asleep, so decided to put if off until the morning. I happened to wake up early today, feeling pretty refreshed, and with my art journal page the first thing in my thoughts. H and the kids were all still sleeping, so I got up and went and sat in the guest room with my art journal, intending to complete my handiwork before they woke up. But when I saw the page again, I felt oddly hesitant to alter it. I just wanted to let it be what is was. That feeling won out and so I spent the morning lull surfing the internet instead of tweaking the page. It's very smudgy, watery, and random, but I think it is one I will take pleasure in remembering creating. It will remind me of Thanksgiving 2012, my third pregnancy, and hyperemesis recovery.

Spring and Fall, 2nd art journal page

"Spring and Fall: To a Young Child" 

Márgarét, are you gríeving

Over Goldengrove unleaving?

Leáves, líke the things of man, you

With your fresh thoughts care for, can you?

Ah!  ás the heart grows older

It will come to such sights colder

By and by, nor spare a sigh

Though worlds of wanwood leafmeal lie;

And yet you wíll weep and know why.

Now no matter, child, the name:

Sórrow's spríngs áre the same.

Nor mouth had, no nor mind, expressed

What heart heard of, ghost guessed:

It ís the blight man was born for,

It is Margaret you mourn for.

--Gerard Manley Hopkins

This is another Victorian favorite of mine. I am sensing a theme here, hmm. . .  I first read this poem as a highschool junior or senior. I think it actually happened to be fall at the time, although maybe my memory has artfully distorted the original event to better honor the poem. . . it could have been summer or winter for all I know. At any rate, I can clearly relive the mulling over it I did then and that never to be forgotten moment when the meaning burst on me, with a shock of recognition and a shiver of appreciation that made me know Gerard Manley Hopkins was a genius. I have been an ardent admirer ever since. He is my favorite poet. 

In this poem, a little girl is wistfully contemplating an autumn scene and lamenting the dying away of the leaves. The poet observes this tenderly, and then notes that it is the intimation of our own mortality that gives the chill and the melancholy to the dying away of the seasons and the decay of nature. 

It's an awesome poem. It is sad, but I do not believe it is depressing, because it's message is simply true. We know this even if we do not choose to think of it very often, but I am existentialist enough to feel that it is the very awareness of our own finitude and mortality that gives life part of it's meaning. So, I genuinely enjoy this poem. I often muse on it when looking out a window at falling leaves, it's a kind of  private autumn ritual. 

It naturally suggested itself as a starting point for my next art journal page. I was a little bit overwhelmed by the um, excessiveness of my Jane Eyre page, so decided on this one to be a bit more spare. I first copied out the whole poem with a black glitter gel pen directly onto the white page. Then I thought it would be fun to make this a kind of practice paper for pastel techinques. I decided to try and color some leaves with the pastels. I just brought in a handful of colorful ones and attempted to copy them. I kept layering colors and blending with water here and there. Doing this felt very relaxing and meditative. I did not have perfection as my goal (lucky thing, lol) or really anything as my goal other than the act itself and losing myself in it. My approach to this art journaling thing, in case it isn't obvious, is more like art therapy in that the purpose is more about creative therapy and unwinding than about art. (And I suppose part of my purpose in blogging about this, well, aside from my own narcissism, is the idea of encouraging other would be beginners at anything to just jump in. It's fun and nothing is going to hurt you.) However, I did at least attempt to make these look something like the original leaves and I do intend to keep my eyes out for advice and tutorials as I go with all of this-- might as well try to gain some skills while I'm at it. :) After I finished with my leaves, I added a little color to the bottom and top left corners of the page and  pasted in some leaf shaped book paper cut outs to fill things in. I doodled some swirls. . . I think in hindsight the page may have been better off without these. 

There are obviously a few oopsies on this page. I somehow manged to smudge one of the swirls, and my two year old attacked with a gel pen near the top of the page before I could stop her. This was even though I had given her paper of her own and allowed her to use my supplies. All I asked was that she leave my page alone. . . sigh. Here is a close up of her handiwork:

And here are some more pictures of my page. I tried to take better photos this time, hope it makes a difference.   

 

Why me? Why a blog? Why an art journal?

There is something uniquely exciting about writing that first post on a brand new blog. At least for me there is. Like many in my generation, I've started and maintained a handful of blogs in my time before now. I've had a couple private diary style blogs, a keeping-up-with-my-friends-and-chatting-about books blog, a blog on spirituality and personal growth (did not get very far with that one, hmm. . .), but that thrilling brand new start feeling of opening a first post returns in all it's inspiring potentiality and original freshness. . . ah. Like opening a new box of crayons when you are a little kid.

This is my first time blogging about art or anything crafty. I am also a complete newb to the world of visual journaling and art journaling. I am not even an "arty" person. I've never taken an art class, had an art lesson, or ever troubled myself to learn the basic rudiments of sketching and painting, something I theoretically believe everyone should do. That is okay. My life is not over yet. Why blog about it then? I simply thought it would be fun to have a place to chronicle the journey, and if anyone wants to read along so much the better. I anticipate I will be writing about a variety of other things as well, once I get into the flow of blogging again. It may end up that the art journaling adventure expresses itself as one of several interweaving thematic strands.

A little more about me-- I am a 20-something mom to three children under three. That is to say, I have a two year old and a seven month old and am pregnant with a third. Yes, I wonder about my sanity at times too, but on good days we have a blast and I wouldn't trade my little growing brood for anything. :-) In some ways it feels like this is an odd season of life to begin a new hobby as well as a new writing project (this blog), but at the same time, I feel this is a season of life in which I could more than ever benefit from carving out a little time and space to nurture my self and creativity. I think if I can make time for this a couple times a week I will be doing myself and my family a favor in the long run.

In a way, it is my current pregnancy that led me to consider beginning an art journal at all. You see, I had hyperemesis for the first months. It's an awful condition that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, and I really don't want to write about it. I'm trying to put those days out of my mind, but if anyone is curious, you can google and read some of the horror stories that have been posted online. I had a moderate case, was on home health and round the clock medication via subcutaneous pump just to keep me out of the hospital. I don't know what I would have done without the help from my family, church family, friends, and very supportive H. For weeks I spent the better part of many days nearly bedridden, and it was good day if I didn't actively want to die. During my better moments, one of the things I ended up doing to pass the time and distract me a little was to look at blogs on art journaling and watch art journal tutorials on youtube. At first I was just curious, as a life long journaler, to learn what was this thing called art journaling? Soon I became fascinated and the hours were passing more quickly. I remember thinking, wow, if I felt better I would like to try something like this! And that thought led to, hey, I will feel better someday! Maybe I should start thinking up some ideas and shopping online for supplies!

Supply shopping was fun, I will say that. I kept filling up my cart on Amazon, being horrified at the total and how quickly things added up, emptying the cart, and starting over again. I ended up streamlining quite a bit in comparison to my initial heady impulse to extravagance before placing my final order, which in the end consisted of:

Caran d'Ache Neocolor 11 Water Soluable Pastels (set of 15)
Strathmore Watercolor Visual Journal
Old Masters Brush Set-- Set of 8
(I had, and still have, absolutely no idea of what to shop for when it comes to brushes. I chose these because I needed something, didn't want to spend too much, and was scared of ending up with garbage if I spent too little. I hope these were a good choice, does anybody know?)
Mod Podge
and
Sargent Glitter Gel Pens

That's it. I thought it would be enough for a basic start and if this catches on for me I can acquire more things later. I also asked my mom to bring me a stack of old magazines so I "could make collages". This puzzled her a bit until I made her read an article on art journaling and look at some pictures of the amazing things people have done with a bit of creativity, some clippings, and glue. She was duly charmed and now I have quite a happy assortment of National Geographics, Country Livings, and Better Homes and Gardens to scavenge through.

And you know what? Eventually, I did start to feel better! I was one of the lucky ones who became functional again at 13 weeks, and a little before then I placed my order. The wonderful box of supplies arrived a couple days ago, and today I completed my first art journal page. It definitely has beginner stamped all over it (a pun! lol!), but it felt relaxing to scribble and experiment (not to mention fun just to be doing anything!) and I enjoyed trying out all my new stuff. I will post about creating this page tomorrow, complete with pics (oh boy. . . ).

:-)